Someone hijacked my GPS.
I don’t have definitive proof of this, but how else would you explain the pushy GPS lady leading me in circles?
Literally.
Get on the Beltway. Get off the Beltway. Get on the Beltway. Get off the Beltway.
Seriously. One minute I’m supposed to go 495 North, and the next I’m supposed to go 495 South.
After the third redirection, I decided to stay on Route 7 and take my chances.
I hate driving in traffic. I’m terrible at it. Not that I’m unsafe, I just tend to miss turns and one-way signs and sometimes stoplights. (Oh, that does sound unsafe.)
Today, I didn’t plan well. I had visited a sweet friend and unfortunately ended up hitting the DC area during rush hour.
Familiar Ground Headed Straight into the Fray
Once I got off the Beltway at Route 7, I realized I actually knew the area. I’d lived there about 27 years ago, so I drove to where I used to live. It looked about the same.
I sat in my car in front of the house for a few minutes trying to figure out my next move. I did not trust the GPS.
At this point, I kicked Apple and Google Maps to the curb and opened my Waze app. At least the graphics here made it seem like a game and not a traffic-laden labyrinth separating me from safety and home.
Now, the new path pointed straight toward downtown DC. Eep!
I called my husband.
Facing the Fear – Not Really Alone
He, of course, couldn’t really help, but he did agree I was in quite a pickle. I told him I would just go the way I knew—495 North, and that I would be fine. Then, I hung up, thought about it for three seconds, and decided to take the straight path through DC. Why not do the scary thing? God would be with me, and I’m a grown up.
It wasn’t so bad.
Really.
Rush hour slowed things down, so I didn’t fly by my turns, and I had time to review the signs and stoplights, so I nailed those too.
When I made it home, my husband already knew I’d gone through DC because we share our location with one another. (Some people think that’s creepy, but I like it.) When he asked me why I decided to go through downtown, I told him I figured I wasn’t alone, and God would help me no matter what happened. Then, he made a joke about Jesus having the wheel, and I totally agreed.
Hope in the Midst of the Pain
Now, as I sit safely at home writing, I realize I’ve been fretting about a lot of stuff lately that God will also guide me through.
My job of nearly 7 years ended a little over a month ago. I loved my job and the people I worked with. It broke my heart to leave it all behind. Now, I’m looking for a new job. No great victory story of deliverance to share with you yet on that front. No great hurrah for God.
I hadn’t wanted to share this because I’m still in the middle of it, but then I thought maybe someone else may be struggling too. Maybe you’re in the middle of something wondering if God is going to lift you out of the pit or leave you there a little longer. I didn’t want you to think you’re the only one.
You’re not alone.
(And if you need someone to talk with, I’m here. I have a lot more time on my hands right now, so send me an email at mbdahl@marybethdahl.org.)
I think it’s good to remember we’re not alone in our struggle. And it’s good to be reminded that as we head into the thick of the downtown of our pain, God will be there. Just because he doesn’t make it easy doesn’t mean his love for you is any less than what it’s always been.
Hold on, dear one. It will be okay.
Check out Psalm 23 for some more encouragement and give a listen to Worn by Tenth Avenue North.
Have you been through a labyrinth of loss and pain? What helped you get to the other side?
Check out my short story “The Door” on page 41.
My friend, as always your words and bravery inspire me and give me hope! I believe God has super plans for you just around the corner. Thanks for sharing your struggles so openly to help others. You rock!
Thank you, friend! You have been such a sweet help to me. Thank you!