Posted by on November 13, 2012

Dear Bucket List,

I realized the other day that I might not get around to attending to each item I’ve put on you. Seeing Niagara Falls and visiting the Grand Canyon aren’t long shots yet, and I can mark going to New York City off the list, but I’m pretty sure living in a solar-powered house back in the woods near a lake and far away from mankind will probably never happen.

The other day, while I was at work, the Science teacher started talking about solar power and saving our planet, and I immediately went to my secret little dream of building my own house and living on the land. And then it dawned on me….given my age and direction in life, that little place in the woods will only ever be a dream.

As I took a step back and analyzed my reasoning, it became clear to me that I wouldn’t accomplish this particular item on my list because I had nothing in place to make it happen, and I had no plans to change that. At first, I figured my little house wouldn’t be built because I’m not super rich, have no skills in this area, and seriously don’t have the time right now to even work on fixing that.

But those things are choices I’m making (well, maybe not the super rich one, but I have chosen to not sacrifice certain areas of my life in order to make more money). I would’ve just assumed the skills thing was out of my league, but then my husband told me about this guy who got tired of paying outrageous power company rate hikes and converted his house to solar energy. He even made a video to show normal folk how to do it! And as far as the time goes, well…we can all make time for the stuff that’s important. That’s actually one of the areas we can control the easiest….as long as we understand how to properly use the word “No.”

The real reason why my solar-powered cabin isn’t going to see the light of day is because I am choosing to pursue other things. That’s a little sad cause it’s a trade-off, but I’m okay with that. I’m not saying it’s completely off the list. It’s just that right now I’d rather build stories than walls and be with people rather than hide away from them all.

I have started to look into how to adapt solar panels to my present residence. So that’s something. I guess the real point here is that I know the reason I haven’t accomplished the things on my list. I haven’t chosen to invest in them. It’s not your fault. I’ll take responsibility for where I am right now. That’s the best I can do.

But I want you to know, dear Bucket List, I’m not finished with you yet! So just hold tight on hiking the Appalachian Trail and being a bestselling author, I have my pen ready to mark a line through a few more items, and I’m working and planning and growing still. You keep the list safe, and I’ll do my part to bring us together.

Peace,

Mary Beth

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