Posted by on January 17, 2013

MP900387533You shouldn’t say that. You’re not being a high-five friend.” 

Sixth graders get a lot of things right. I didn’t hear the particulars of this conversation, but I did hear one student say to another, “You shouldn’t say that. You’re not being a high-five friend.” I don’t know what precipitated this comment, but I do know that the comment ended the negativity in the conversation. 

The students moved on to a better topic, and everyone took with them a little challenge to be a better friend to those around them. And I came away with a great quote for today’s blog and a question to think about.

What makes a high-five friend? Or a fist-bump friend, if you’re super trendy. Or a “ball and socket” friend, if you have a tendency to go for the fist-bump when you’re friend’s hitting you with a high five. What virtues set a simple-wave friend apart from your “high-five” friend?

I came up with my own little “five”.  Five qualities of a fist-bump friend. Feel free to add what your five might be in the comments! 

Five Qualities of a Fist-Bump Friend 

1. Encouragement – a fist-bump friend cheers you on. It’s encouragement all the way with this guy. And by encourage, I mean honest encouragement, not the fake kind. This guy’s on your side, in your corner, got your back! 

2. Camaraderie – With a fist-bump friend, everyone’s on the same team. There might be competition, but in the end, if one person wins then the other one celebrates too. You’re fellow soldiers fighting side by side. 

3.  Humor – A fist-bump friend “gets” you. He knows the little stuff to say that will make you laugh. He understands your jokes, and he forgives your sarcasm (okay I added that one just for me). 

4.  Presence – To be a fist-bump friend, you have to be present. You can’t really high-five someone who’s not around. This friend is there for you when you need them, and when you don’t talk for a while, they’re still there. 

5.  Youchness – Sometimes the high-five stings, the bump is more like a punch, but the intention of this friend is NOT to hurt, but to show you an area that might need some adjustment. This doesn’t happen very often. If it did, then you might feel beat up and unappreciated. This kind of loving confrontation isn’t backhanded or from around a bush. It’s honest and done with lots of love and consideration of your feelings, and when it’s over, you’re both better off. 

Do you have any fist-bump, high-fiving friends? If you do, I’d like to suggest you come up with a secret handshake (mine involves jazz hands–just to keep it real). And yes, I know most of us are grown-ups here, but did you know the secret handshake actually originated with adults? That’s right, look it up! 

And just for fun, here’s a video that might help you develop your high-fiving technique! 



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